The reason.

[freakaga1n]

For the past few months that I have not been on here and had (literally) been seperated and isolated from everyone (almost myself included), I have had time to think. About the normal stuff that messed-up teenagers such as I think about. I mean, who am I? Really? And why am I here? Is there a purpose to life besides sex, sin and happiness?

Through asking these questions to myself, I have concluded that I am alone. Completely and utterly alone. It does not matter how many friends and family I have that care and love me (whom I also love and care for in return), in the end, I will die alone. Everyone goes their seperate ways. People die before one another (naturally, without a 1 in a billion chance "coincidence"), people change. People do this, people do that, this happens, that happens. In the end, through it all, you are alone. You may have shared those experiences and some emotions, you are still alone.

So what do people mean when they say "You're not alone."? It never means that I am never truly not alone, it just means that there just coincidentally (or not so coincidentally, depending on the situation), happens to be another person or other people who are going through the same events as me or feeling the same emotions or whatever.

When I die, I will die alone. I won't go to heaven. Nor will I go to hell. Or be born again. Or even haunt this earth as a "ghost" or "spirit". I will simply disappear as my body and brain shut down. I will no longer be able to feel anything. No longer be able to think anything. I will no longer even exist to do anything.

Therefore, we are lonely people. Every single one of us. And when we are not supposedly feeling lonely, we are just enjoying the presense of others. Or just the thought of it. When we are calm and serene, we are just enjoying our loneliness.

Then that brought in the topic of love for me. What is love? Why do people feel love? Is it really what makes the world go around as people say?

I must say that the only response I found that made sense to me was... well... attraction. Humans are animals. We are all mammals. Except spring time doesn't happen to be our only or main mating season. You see, it's almost as though our entire lifetime is mating season. People spend their entire lives looking for love. It's pretty much looking for a person who you find to be a suitable "mate", who can meet your expectations and demmands for offspring, support (financial and emotional) and security. When these expectations are met, that makes the person happy. That gives the person the sensation of falling in love. When that person, in turn, falls in love with you back, then congradulations! You are "in love".

And really, sex, is pretty much the only reason we exist. It's through the whole system of sex. Your dad forgot to wear a condom when he was 15. Your mum forgot to take "the pill" when she was 21. You weren't planned but your parents had conceived you anyway. They were happy. Or they were not so happy. Or you were a planned child, conceived after months of a completely anal planning process.

Unless you were conceived through non-sexual practices such as IVF.

So does that mean that our entire existance is just... there? There's no real reason to it, or whatever "destiny" whatchamacalits? Everything is just a crazy chain of coincidence? There's no "real reason" to life?

Is everyone just there?

Am I only living because my heart is pumping and my lungs are breathing?

Why?


NOTE: This entire thing is only my opinions and philosophies and thoughts on life and existance. They were not made to challenge, influence or offend you in any way.

[Will]

Therefore, we are lonely people. Every single one of us. And when we are not supposedly feeling lonely, we are just enjoying the presense of others. Or just the thought of it. When we are calm and serene, we are just enjoying our loneliness.

This is the part that stuck out the most for me. I have been so lonely in the past and sometimes in the present that it's difficult to even smile or talk. I've gone days without having conversations. Sometimes I want someone to yell at me just so I can have a dialogue with someone. Maybe that's why I got in so much trouble in school. I was just seeking others to enjoy my loneliness with me.

I hope you don't feel that you alone ALL the time because that totally sucks. Sometimes being isolated and having nothing but your thoughts there with you is a bad thing.

Love is a great idea. I love the idea of love, but what do I know? I'm a 32 year old man who has never had an adult relationship. I know I CAN love, I just want it in return sometimes. Even once, but that can't be my sole purpose for being: to find love. We're here to figure out why we're here. If love happens it happens. I just hope it happens soon.

I'm glad to see you back here. I hope you keep coming up with ideas on life and love because believe me, they will change over time with your experiences.

See ya around.

will

[TilDeathDoUsPart]

My mother died surrounded by family and close friends - I hope that she didn't feel like she died alone. And I don't think she did either. I think that just because one individual is dying doesn't mean that they are alone in it - it affects so many other people - like the ripple effect. Just think about someone who broke their ankle. Yeah, they alone broke it but it'll affect other people in their lives too - people hold open the door for them, they can't drive, they might have trouble going up and down stairs, etc. I think that in the end, we aren't alone. We as humans are social mammals, we thrive off of each other by nature.

freakaga1n, have you ever been in love? Love is one of those things that you can't really criticize it unless you have experienced it yourself.

I don't really know why we're put here on earth, why we are living. All I know is that whatever the reason, I'm glad I'm here. I've stopped looking for that answer so long ago, because it baffles me every time. Who cares why we're here? We're here anyway so might as well make the best of it.

TilDeath

[Sorrow]

I don't really know why we're put here on earth, why we are living. All I know is that whatever the reason, I'm glad I'm here. I've stopped looking for that answer so long ago, because it baffles me every time. Who cares why we're here? We're here anyway so might as well make the best of it.
TilDeath

TilDeath,

I understand your philosophy on life. Although for some suffering, it's not easy to make the best of it. Some people suffer day in and day out, they no longer want to try to 'make the best' of anything. They simply just want the pain to stop.